


Thrym, the Annoying Bastard

by thor-the-asgardian-meme (love_from_belle)



Series: Thor's Stories [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Gen, the story of how Thor became a giant's bride
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-14
Updated: 2018-05-14
Packaged: 2019-05-06 22:10:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14657234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/love_from_belle/pseuds/thor-the-asgardian-meme
Summary: Okay. So you have all heard this story before, haven't you? But have you heard it from Thor's perspective?Written for my tumblr blog, @thor-the-asgardian-meme.





	Thrym, the Annoying Bastard

Well, how about, no.

I’m kidding. Of course I will tell this story. I need a bit of time to prepare, though...

*takes 5000 years to prepare*

Okay. Right.

So, the giant Thrym was a right bastard. I probably shouldn’t use that kind of language on here, but I shall let it pass just this once since there are no other ways to describe that hammer-stealing maniac.

Thrym stole my Mjolnir.

I don’t know how he did it.

He stole my Mjolnir.

HE STOLE MY MJOLNIR.

I left it hanging on a peg overnight and somehow he snuck into Asgard and STOLE MY MJOLNIR.

Then, the most horrible giant insisted on marrying the Lady Sif (yes, I said Sif) in payment for returning it.

Of course, I was not going to tell Sif that. She is not afraid of killing anyone who dares propose marriage to her, Prince of Asgard or not, and I am not a suicidal fool.

Loki and I discussed this at length with Heimdall before coming up with a plan to return my Mjolnir to its rightful place in my hand.

I would pretend to be Sif, and Loki would pretend to be a bridesmaid and I would marry Thrym. At least until I got my Mjolnir back.

Unfortunately, neither of us was good at makeup. So Loki went behind my back and asked Freyja to do it for us. This is how she ended up in the tale. None of us wanted the Sif situation to become public, or for her to ever find out, and now I am going to have to hide under a rock for the next ten thousand years to escape her wrath.

The trip to Jotunheim was (theoretically) fairly simple. Get to the Bifrost without being seen, use the Bifrost to get to the wedding, hey presto, Mjolnir has returned to me.

Of course, nothing went to plan. At least half of Asgard saw us doing the walk of shame to the Bifrost. Although to be honest, most of the people probably thought that I’d lost another bet against Loki.

And, again, when we got to Jotunheim, all of our stashed weapons were easily found and disposed of.

Thrym actually made it halfway through the marriage ceremony before giving me Mjolnir. And then I proceeded to do what any red-blooded God of Thunder would do. I massacred everyone in the room. Except Loki, of course. He may be a pain, but he helped me reclaim my Mjolnir.

(little did I know that he had been responsible for the stealing of it in the first place)

This is why my Mjolnir has its own bed now.

Because if my Mjolnir is close to me, no-one will ever steal it again.

(however I have gained several hundred black eyes from accidentally summoning my Mjolnir into bed while asleep)

Now, excuse me while I find myself an appropriate cave to live in away from the wrath of the most mighty and amazing Lady Sif.

**Author's Note:**

> Requested by @d-lewis-avengerwrangler on tumblr.


End file.
